𝒈𝒐𝒐𝒅𝒃𝒚𝒆
tonight I had to make a difficult decision. it was forced. I forced myself. I didn't know what to do for some time now. I was losing who I am and I had lost my self-respect. how could I keep trying even tho I saw how much I didn't mean anything to him? how could I keep losing myself in his eyes when they weren't even seeing me? what could life offer me when I am no longer myself? I gave up on the person I thought I loved. he was the only person I was ready to give up my everything for. I just wanted to run, far far away. I wanted to disappear and never come back. I couldn't even say something. I didn't even say goodbye. I will never be able to let go of him if he is there staring at me while I say my goodbyes. this piece of note is the worst blog I have ever written. I couldn't care less. my thoughts are all over the place. I can't put words together and make sense of them. I cant even speak one word out loud. I am silenced by all the overwhelming feeling...